My internal debate over whether or not I am a Christian has finally come to an end. I spoke to Ed today, we had a really great discussion about what "Christian" means. I admitted that I am completely hung up on the label. I stated that my biggest problem with Christianity is that people take it at face value (this isn't my issue with just Christianity, but with religion in general). I have a really hard time believing that someone can take something so complex and make it into something simplistic. This would be the cynic in me. So, why haven't I been baptized? Simply, I was afraid of being a hypocrite. I was so afraid of not truly letting Christ into my life. Am I still having a hard time with this? Yes. I think that to some degree, I may always have this internal debate. But I think that it's more intellectual then emotional.
I asked Ed how I would know that it's time to be baptized. I guess that there is not a definitive answer to this question. Apparently, there is a point that people get to where being baptized is "acceptable" (I use this word for lack of a better one). I was told that I had crossed this point a long time ago.
So here I am. Accepting Christ. Calling myself a Christ-follower (as another friend likes to call herself), rather than a Christian. I believe in the teachings of Christ. I embrace these teachings. I have a great relationship with God. I love this relationship, and I have worked really hard on this relationship. I am embracing my faith. I am embracing my growth and proud of the journey that I have been on for the past three years. Therefore, I will be baptized at Evergreen this fall.
If I could tell the world just one thing
It would be that we're all OK
And not to worry 'cause worry is wasteful
And useless in times like these
I won't be made useless
I won't be idle with despair
I will gather myself around my faith
For light does the darkness most fear
My hands are small, I know
But they're not yours, they are my own
But they're not yours, they are my own
And I am never broken
~Jewel
2 comments:
Hurrah! We will be having a PARTY for you!
Yay!!!
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